"Where to"

Today coming out of the acad block, literally throwing my answer sheet towards invigilator, on the presumed last pen-paper exam of my life, I felt like running. I was running away from the block, from the heaps of lectures I ve attended in my lifetime, bounds of knowledge I ve supposedly gained, oodles of wisdom I ve garnered, mounts of confidence that this all has put in me. I wanted to run away from All of it.

I had a lot of things in my mind, old stories seeping in, how ive constructed way arounds, to beat supposed education, how i tried to run out before, but couldnt, how i dint do what i dint like, but the next day i was doing the thing, writing something, copying something of some extraterrestrial relevance, coz on Earth I could not find it relevant to learn the nomenclature of Panthera Tigris of any relevance for me.

I tried a lot to learn, I tried to score marks, coz that was supposed to be everything one could aim in life for, it was the need as well as societal recoginition, it was the goal, the entire life (till now), for writing papers and w8in for marks.

The cycle was very simple, atleast for me, pushed to learn things that dint make sense to me, so not doing them, then scribbling three hours every quarter to write things that i dint know, then for praying for good numbers in my report, and then not getting them, and then pushed to learn things that dint make sense...

With time, i actually gained wisdom, and the pinnacle of wisdom was acheived when it glanced upon me that no one in the entire education system gave shit about education. Not a human cared that what was learning, what was that i was supposed to know, what characterstics could and should have been instilled, coz they were all checking papers, and that takes a lot of time.

"Education" was never enough.

I was still running out of the examination hall, with the question sheet in my hand, which I glouriously answered in 90 minutes. I was still trying to run away, and suddenly a thought drips into my mind and I slow down, and I say "Where to"???

After all those years in schools, I ve learnt only one thing, writing papers, that too not perfectly. Now I have no where to go, no more marks to be scored, no more prayers every quarter. Now what will I do, its all over. All goals of life have been done with (not fulfilled, but done with).

Still pondering over it, and I am sure I will find some way, but lets hope I dont waste next 23 years of my life, just trying to fit in and cramming the integration of cot x.

policy/politics in place

My term four ends, I pick up ET and see that the policy paralysis is also getting some strokes to end. But is it that easy to take decisions and implement in India, with such a complex and unstable political structure. Surely not. The policies or steps I am referring to are, FDI permission and diesel price hike.

Lets understand the condition of government first; fiscal deficit is rising; inflation is rising; Rupee is depreciating; markets are slow;negative sentiments towards the ruling alliance; credit rating going worse; elections approaching, which will require more spending in terms of subsidies and waivers to lure voters. These are some of the issues, among many others. 

So to improve this condition government could have taken various steps. It could have raise debts, but for bad credit ratings, it is expensive and scarce. It could have printed currency, which would have increased inflation and devaluated currency further. It could have reduced its transfer spending in NREGA or other schemes, which is certainly not practical considering the political scenario. It could have used fiscal policy to somehow bring fiscal deficit down, but this would have certainly affected the growth adversely. Now a healthy option is to bring foreign money into the system. So the government played the long awaited FDI shot. 

Opening country for Foreign Direct Investment, is a solution to many aforementioned issues like increasing investment, Rupee appreciation, raising income. Clubbed with price hike of Diesel, it impacts fiscal deficit very strongly as a major chunk of the spending goes in financing the subsidies on oil and gas, diesel being prominent among them. Raising the diesel prices has to be a cautious decision always as it effects the whole  supply chain and will increase inflation with a high rate. But this will reduce burden of the govt on fiscal deficit front, which is reaching to levels of 70% of GDP. 

FDI in retail is open to states at their own discretion and the stores could be opened only in cities which have a population of 1 million or more. Along with this 30% of sourcing to be done by local manufacturers. These terms emphasis the fact the govt is wary of the decision and wants it to be thoroughly thought over decision at every level. Some states are apprehensive and have passed the option while some are embracing it. For reference, in China, even with lesser restrictions, Walmart is losing money even after a decade of presence.

All this said and discussed, the much needed policy changes are not panacea to Indian economic condition, but also not detrimental to Indian people. 

Lets look where does the Politics Policy takes it...

Year up. Year to go.

This post is more of an update. Goes like I have completed my internship, back to the college, stayed at home for about a fortnight after a long time, et cetera.

IMT has entered into its 32nd year, I in second year. And the start is looking good for IMT considering the facts that the junior batch is awesomely talented, better and reliable systems being put in place, batch strength growing, and ample other things.

For me the year has started not that good, a couple of failures gazing at me with wide eyes, asking me to respond fast as I dont have much time to act and wait for results. Apart from that, the trimester has been okay. Some good papers in the term, along with better faculty, which finally gives a feel that i have enrolled for a finance course.  A visiting faculty from treasury department of an extremely reputed bank in India has impressed the whole batch by his derivatives management and teaching skills. Another one for Fixed Income Securities with his experience and vigour is no less.  Other experienced teachers trying hard to get concepts of supply chain, investments, strategy etc in our head.

The most important thing about this time is that the goose chase is going to begin soon or might have already begun (actually, I cant see clearly from this far back and with these many people in front of me), and its time (alternatively, there is no time) to gear up.

3 Weeks Later

Huff!!! Finally, into the internship. Now three weeks into the process and I have learnt a lot (not much about the industry, but about this firm and how the world out of IT companies is so different). The part of  curriculum, which only seem to be good if you get a PPO but for nothing else, has started making sense. There is a lot of opportunity to see what you have learnt in last year, what industry expects out of you an year later, what subjects were important and what subjects will Be important.

The biggest difference in this non-IT industry is that People Know What They Are Doing. In this energy industry, you know your job, how are the other functions related, how the finances are handled and most of all what are the direct and indirect consequences of your actions at the end result. You know you are working not only because your manager has asked you to and he will be pissed if you do not do what he has said and in the manner he has told. The job you perform has much larger effects than your annual rating. You are not coming to office to swipe the card and get your billing done by a Foreign client, but creating value to see your country develop and being a part of it. You are not providing service to some mammoth company of the west, but building framework for your country to take that shape which is respected by the world.

There are some things in this sector, which can counter my thoughts and could try to retune my mindset and which is generally the arguements by many people who are unsatisfied by the industry and how it works. The best one and most common one is to blame the government. They say about bureaucracy and corruption in govt. organizations, their dominant hold over the whole sector, their firms hindering the projected flows, their insufficient focus (Investments!) on infrastructural development, the delayed payments for work done, and many others and none of which is false or even mild. They are true and not only for this sector but for every industry in the Republic of India. But this does not mean things are not going to change or even if they dont, we need to grow, and providing cheap services to foreign companies and adding the fees to GDP is not at all helping.

But I am hating some part of this internship like travelling to NOIDA daily in third class(rather worse) city buses, passing through the parts of Ghaziabad, which I dreaded(I have to see that building on NH-24), waking up at 7 in the morning, sleeping at night. On the other side, I have met some really good people here who have taught me a lot about the sector.

I dont now, I might be developing an MBA perspective but now I can see the importance of various functions in the firm, how they are correlated, how they effect the business, and it is very interesting to see the interfacing complexities.

Entrepreneurial Gyaaaannnn

Attended a session on entrepreneurship today. Learnt a lot many good things, which I m sure I will forget till tomorrow  or max till day after that, u see, I have a quiz to prepare for. But for the little time I heard Siddhartha Sharma, I was awed, not only by the content but the way he delivered in 75 mins. The examples, the theories, a couple of hard facts about corporate life (which I was cognizant of but not very conscious of), a peek into the future et al, which he presented, asked me to give it a thought.

The man was not only trying to instill in us an entrepreneurial spirit but was also trying to make us aware of what is expected out of us by us (can say it was a bit of spiritual bias but more towards psychological side). Making money is good and required but not by getting frustrated and doing things half-heartedly every day, or the way the world expects from you, cause the world sees you as just another individual but you know you are unique. People worth people who are certain of themselves and know what they are doing and why. The theory goes as:

Passion into Profession

A tale which he shared was of Bopcy Salasar, a 6 year old firefighter, who was having cancer. When his Mother comes to know this, he asks Bopcy what You want to Do in life, and he says I want to be Fireman, and she puts in efforts to make this happen with the help of an NGO. It happens. The boy gets to do firefighting  with the firemen team due to special consideration by the supervisor. The joy he must have felt, how many of us can really feel after a hard days job.

A step based approach to get started is to consider the four major questions: What, Why, When and How. The questions are as succinct as they seem, but can be elaborated as much as desired but just to get confused.

This is quite amazing that we like all this stuff and gets pumped up when anyone else tells us or exemplify before us or Amir khan says "Kamyaabi ke liye nahi kabil hone ke liye padho, kamyaabi jhak maar ke peeche aayegi", but we never dare to go for it. There are reasons to justify this like parental expectations, family responsibilities, societal pressure, I am happy I can handle this pressure and what not the F but can it be justified anyhow?

At the last moment of life four things Talent, Skill, Potential, Dreams which lie dormant for a big part of our life will suddenly became active and will ask, "why were we wasted? We came to the world because of you."

72 hours non stop

This Friday evening, I entered in the college to see it flooded by flood lights. There was a football match going on in the ground, when I remembered that ChakraVyuh is commenced. I moved further to see a handball match, then a volleyball match, then a basketball match at BBC while hearing about a lawn tennis match and TT games. Realizing what would be the scene at baddy court, I rushed to it to just get overwhelmed.

In colleges the excitement levels rise when there is some fest or some sports activity, but this was something different... here was a phenomenal adrenaline rush clubbed with a sense of integrity and passion for respective college team and also for good players which were in plenty. I stood there with my luggage (as I was coming from home) for around two hours amazed by the air. Sports has a characteristic that keeps you awed, even when you are supporting you can feel the win or the loss vicariously.

The 24 teams fighting for the trophy in a 72 hour non stop battle where there is not even a single dull instant. The experience is uber, second to none. Teams ranging from IMT alums to IFMR Chennai covered a hell lot of India ( a little bit of France too, disguised in the form of foreign exchange students). Sportscom displayed meticulous planning and excellent execution in carrying off the event... what a show!!!

I don't know how legendary 'Abhimanyu' did it, but for me its impossible to get out once you get in the Chakravyuh.

Crossing the (admission) line...

This is the admission season in IMT, and today I got to meet some of the candidates appearing for the process. I was wondering how different it looks from the other side of the line. The stats which you might need to vomit to the panel like Indias GDP, PPP, blah, repo rate, base rate, CRR, FDI, blah, FII and blahhhh. All the things your respective coaching instis teach you before you come in.

But once one crosses the line and stands where I am standing today, everything looks so mechanistic, repetitive, and mysterious as how can you gauge a person by 15 minutes of interaction, when you know he has been all armored for these 15 minutes. Still interviewers manage to do it somehow and till date they have proven themselves wise (I can say that by seeing my batch mates). All those gyaan you heard by the seniors and coaching institute's faculty starts to justify itself...

Among other things I felt today was pride as the students I met today were so anxious, nervous, cautious..., even after being so good. I realized I am at a place which is fought for very diligently, by some really good people.

A real good experience as to know where I started and how much Ive travelled, and is this what I expected of me at that time when I was trying to cross the line...